EVERY carer has a story. Those caring for a loved one with a mental illness – and coping with the changes to their own lives – can be unsure how, or where, to get help.
Peninsula Health’s carer consultant Judy Anderson knows well the challenges, as she has 15 years’ experience caring for a family member with a debilitating mental health condition.
She often finds herself saying to other carers: “I know what you are going through,” she told The Times last week.
“It also helps the carer to know that they are not alone in their journey and that someone else really does understand.”
Ms Anderson is sharing her story to help other carers as part of Carer’s Week, 11-18 October. Her insight and advice has helped many carers connect with support services and local community groups.
“There are support services for every situation,” she said. “Organisations like Tandem for families and carers who care for people with a mental illness and Carers Victoria provide excellent resources.
“Local support groups for carers provide connectedness, information and workshops to help with the emotional effects.”
In many cases, family and friends notice the behavioural differences and warning signs of mental illness before it is apparent to the person themselves.
“They try so hard to prove they are ok, and we are left to pick up the pieces,” Ms Anderson said.
“My life changed 15 years ago. I suspected something was wrong, but the process of finding help for Tim [not his real name] was difficult as he was living interstate.”
He has since moved back to the Mornington Peninsula, where he grew up, and moved in with Ms Anderson, he can be supported full time.
“It was a long and emotional process,” she said. “That’s why it is important to have a lot of support when you first become a carer.
“You’ve just discovered your life will never be the same; you’re also trying to find out as much as you can about the illness and it’s common to be grieving for the loved one who has changed.”
Grief is a common emotion among carers as they come to terms with the illness and the unexpected situation in which they find themselves.
“In our case it was devastating,” she said. “He had a promising and exciting career and future, however, his life has now taken a very different direction.
“Like many carers I am concerned about what the future holds for our loved family member, but speaking up and reaching out will ensure that carers like me are heard, and that our concerns matter.”
For more information on caring for someone with a mental illness, call Ms Anderson on 9238 8634.
Rosebud Carers Group meets on the first Thursday of each month, and Peninsula Carers Frankston meets on the third Monday evening of each month.